"The is a large gate behind childhood that closes" -Civilization of Max Bright
Haunting words. Haunting music. Can I grow up? Can I become a man? Can I be the man that others deserve? That she deserves? I want too. I am not sure I know how. But I want that love. To share it, to be a part of it, as it overflows from any person or relationship or family or home and spreads out like a rising tide into the world. The peace that comes with compassion, with empathy, with no longer being... alone?
Can I pack up the toys of my childhood, its whims and flights, and put them away?
All things that we touch are a part of us, forever. Joys and sorrows both leave their scars.
Suffering is life, and desire. Desire is not love. I know desire, what I want to know is love.
All things happen for a reason. Even if that meaning is to nothing and no one but ourselves. An article, a movie, a song, a feeling, a moment... they layer together, creating and recreating us, as we are pulled and moved by the selves within us, reshaping what we are and what we will become.
What will I become?
"Sounds of laughter shades of life are ringing
Through my open mind inciting and inviting me.
Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns,
And calls me on and on across the universe"